Sometimes, when you're goofing off on the internet, you end up some place scary.
Recently I googled "images" to find a photo for one of my projects, and I came upon, quite by accident, the blog of an atheist fellow intent on "converting" us all to his very sad point of view.
I won't send you there by link, my friends. It is not for the faint of heart, and I just can't direct you there without a good friend close by to hold your hand.
Anyway, I ended up on this site, with its black background and vulgar language, its vague profiles and disturbing imagery, and read a charming post about a parody of the song "Jesus Loves the Little Children." This one was called "Jesus Loves the Little Zygotes," and its primary purpose was to instruct believers that Jesus didn't really love children, He just loved to give them all sorts of sufferings and hardships to muddle through. It was simultaneously intriguing and nauseating.
I knew I should just ignore it and go back to reading the wholesome blogs of my Christian sisters, but I couldn't help myself. I also knew that I should definitely NOT post a comment, but I am not known for my prudence.
I didn't give it much thought, just a lot of emotion, and left his site in a huff. I did not intend to return, ever. I was so offended and sad, I swore I wouldn't come back.
Then one day I googled something else and found myself back at his site, where he had posted a response to my comment. Now I'd done it.
I took a deep breath before reading his reply to me. I knew it would offend and annoy me, and I told myself to punch myself in the gut before I read on. I can be a sensitive one, and I knew I didn't want to hear what he had to say.
I was not disappointed.
I read his reply and pondered what to do with it. I REALLY wanted to give him some more. I wanted to address his comments point by point, highlighting his ignorance.
But I knew that this was a tough soul, one used to debating with amateurs like me. Words from me would only fuel his passion for atheism, not convert him.
But I just couldn't let it go, so I decided to share it here. The following are my comments and what he had to say.
ME: OK, so here's a comment from someone who happened upon this blog for some unknown reason and will certainly never return again.
But I digress.
I had a daughter born with a heart defect. She died when she was four months old.
Did Jesus "give" her that defect so that you could mock her suffering, and His?
I'd explain it to you, but it is so far beyond your understanding that all I can do is pity you. Learn from your inevitable sufferings. Find joy in your existence. You have been given the great gift of life and appear to be completely clueless.
Thank God for those suffering children and the lessons they teach us. Learn up, my friend.
Time is short for each of us. If I am wrong, and there is no God, OK. But what if you're wrong. Hmmm...what if...
Then my dear atheist friend responded. Read on to hear what he had to say. The comments that I wanted to make to him are in caps.
MY ATHEIST: Cathy, I am sorry that your daughter was born with such an affliction, but.....(WHY ARE YOU SORRY? WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE IF SOME BLOB OF CELLS WAS BORN DEFECTIVE? HER LIFE DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING ANYWAY, RIGHT?)
You will demonize me for mocking a belief in an all-loving, all-powerful 'god' who either cannot or will not assist the smallest most helpless of his purported 'special creations', but in reality I am not the one who is deserving of pity, you are the one upon which much pity should be heaped. (WHEN DID I DEMONIZE YOU? WHEN I DISAGREED? AND DEMONIZE IS AN INTERESTING WORD CHOICE. DEMONS, ANGELS, HMMM. NO SUCH THING, RIGHT?)
You claim these are so-called "tests" (I NEVER USED THE WORD TEST!!! I DID NOT CLAIM THAT GOD CREATED MY DAUGHTER WITH A DEFECT TO TEST ME!!!) and they occur to teach us something but what kind deity shreds a mother's heart by giving her a beautiful daughter only to steal the child away a few short months later? (NO ONE STOLE MY DAUGHTER. HOW DARE YOU CALL HER BEAUTIFUL! SHE WAS DEFECTIVE, REMEMBER?) I am sorry but your claim of 'lessons from the lord' embedded in these tragedy is a psychological spin you put on the event to make it all seem to have a higher purpose.(I READILY ADMIT IN MY BOOK THAT IF I AM WRONG, I AM USING THE THOUGHT OF AN AFTERLIFE AND A FURTHER PURPOSE FOR MY DAUGHTER'S SUFFERINGS TO COMFORT ME. WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT?)
The truth is, what happened with your dear child is unfortunate and sad,(WHY WAS SHE DEAR? IF THERE IS NO GOD, NO PURPOSE IN LIFE, WHAT MADE HER SPECIAL?) she was lucky to have a mom who dearly loved her for the child she was (WHAT IS LOVE?), and she was not merely a pawn in some overseers elaborate game to 'test' a family.
It is much more comforting to think that all that was at play was unfortunate circumstances and not a maniacal 'guy in the clouds' deliberately torturing his 'beloved' creations. (WHY DO YOU THINK HER DEATH TORTURED ME? CAN YOU EVEN IMAGINE THAT I AM AT PEACE?)
And your last part, it's called Pascal's Wager (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pascal%27s_Wager, look into it.(OH, YOU'RE KIDDING. I'M A STUPID, UNEDUCATED CHRISTIAN WHO NEVER HEARD OF PASCAL. GOSH. THANKS FOR ENLIGHTENING ME.) "What if you're wrong" doesn't hold much water because much more can be said of what might happen if you are wrong than "so what". (HUH?)We both could be wrong and the Muslims correct, that would damn both of us(NEWSFLASH...THE MUSLIMS AND I BELIEVE IN THE SAME GOD), or the Hindus correct and where would that leave us?(MAYBE I'D BE A QUEEN NEXT TIME AROUND...OR A WORM, WHO CARES? I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW...) Ultimately though, what if you're wrong? You have spent a life worshiping and bowing to the unseen, making excuses for the deity with your loved ones as examples, spent so much precious time on your knees idle when you could have been out doing some real good for humanity.(YOU PRESUMPTUOUS, STUPID SON OF A ....YEP, ME AND MOTHER THERESA, ON OUR KNEES, IGNORING THE NEEDS OF THE WORLD. ARE YOU CRAZY?!?)
Thanks for visiting.(YOU'RE WELCOME. I'M SO IMPRESSED BY YOUR MANNERS.)
OK, I'm sorry. I just had to vent, to share what he can't -- what he refuses to -- hear.
But I just can't forget him.
And I have a devious plan.
While he's posting on his blog, encouraging folks to worship the god of science, laughting at Christians, dressing in black, I'll be doing something that would drive him nuts.
I'll be praying for him.
I've been doing it regularly, and enjoying it immensely. I offered my Holy Communion for him today, and I just couldn't stop smiling. He's My Atheist now, and I'm hangin' on tight.
My goal is to meet him someday in Heaven. I'll be the one with the pink carnation, rosary in hand, silly grin on my face. He'll probably still be dressed in black, shaking his head, amazed that I didn't forget him.
It'll be a sweet reunion, one worth waiting for, much more satisfying than what I might be faced with on his nasty old blog.
My Atheist, this one's for you.